Cydniey Buffers (cydniey) wrote,
Cydniey Buffers
cydniey

On the state of the Cydniey Quinne Reese

I finally settled on a name. This time I am going to legally change it. And take on Doc's last name. I always wanted to be among Reeses. Some sites now know me as Quinne, some still know Cydniey.

I've been waiting about 2 months for my webhost to contact me about restoring one of my sites. I guess it's just not going to happen. I looked at other webhosts, and chose Bluehost on the advice of this marvelous piece of software I use on my sites. I got phoenixwillrise.com on Bluehost. But you have to pay three years in advance, and that is not doable now. Right now, the first of the year I should be able to get at least one onto Bluehost. I love my current webhost, but the waiting in silence has gotten old and I'm not the type to nag. I bring it up once and that is your chance, buddy. I am not forgiving. That's no secret about me. I hold grudges.

I am trying to let go of a lot of grudges that are weighing down my psyche and my life.

There is controversy considering the Big Ass Truck. We were selling it back to S. He paid to get it fixed since the fixes were needed before he sold it to us. I'm hoping we get it back. It's the easiest way to get a vehicle. But I have a feeling S has found a buyer and needs the title. I want the Big Ass Truck. Doc doesn't know this about me but I have a fear of driving in cars after the truck where you are above everything. The truck is jacked up with chunky tires. I have to literally climb up into it. Please, Universe, give us the Big Ass Truck back. If only for a year.

If Doc starts on rebuilding his credit like I am, in a year we will be in good shape to get a truck of our own. A smaller truck. Doc's not into having a giant truck anymore.

My dad had a heart attack, and a few hours later, a stroke. He is in a rehab hospital awaiting stablization of his heart so they can operate on it. WAIT! I know it is your want to send thoughts and prayers. I have visited, been the good "daughter" and I am done. The mic is dropped. I feel nothing about this. I have chosen not to think about it. Chances are that my mom is going to have to care for him in ways she never thought of. Schadenfruede is due here. But I'm not feeling it.I guess I'm not cold-hearted after all. My heart is dead. And I'm fine with that. Doc and I have our own lives to lead.

Kraig remains a problem. He wants to come over during the week and hang out, but Doc isn't home. So, no. He's being stubborn, Doc is being stubborn and I'm just sitting in the middle trying to appease everyone. I don't like it here. This is not me, being in the middle. Ususally I am simply discarded. Or disregarded. There's a song in there, but alas, I have a King sized case of writer's block. I'm afraid what is goiing to come out when I can't hold it in anymore. An Epic Concept Album that about 300 people will listen to, ever. I could do worse.

Speaking of that, I haven't heard from the band in a couple of weeks. We were supposed to rehearse last weekend. I don't know what happened with that. The guitarist and bassist are being sketchy. So I have no idea where the album recordings are going. I'm here and waiting. I can't afford an Uber home from there right now. I'm paying off all of my credit accounts early. Webhost, paid. Cable bill, paid. Money put away in my savings account to pay the credit card way more than is due.

I have a story but it is in the beginning, so I'm going to experience more of it before I write it out. Suffice to say I am leaving the house in a few days and going to a bead store.
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