I made myself the Best Turkey Hoagie today and had it with some Cool Ranch Doritos. I figured since I had eaten enough calories, I would take a Latuda. I have six more left, no point in feeling as shitty and angry as I did while I still have some. So I took one and took a two hour nap. I woke up with my rosy attitude back. And you know what guys? Doc doesn't see it. He just does not see the difference. Not enough for it to be worth it to him.
He was going over next month's budget with me today. It covered everything, including a bag of medical grade mary jane, but didn't include the Latuda. I'd much rather forgo the medical grade, keep smoking what I'm smoking from our last harvest, and get the Latuda. He doesn't see why. I could weep.
I need Doctor B to talk to him. I need to talk to Doctor B about the miraculous results and then have Doctor B put my subjectivity along side of his objectivity and talk to Doc about it. Doc doesn't see why I need both Latuda and Seroquel, if they are both anti-psychotics. Well, obviously because they are doing different things. The Latuda is even helping with my (dare I say it out loud?) cognitive issues. Instead of shortening my memory as it warned, it has improved it. I feel like I am thinking clearly for the first time in how long, Lilliane? 7 years?
Oh, and reeree, Hello there, stranger! Y'all just come out of the woodwork some days! Happy to see you in my comments, thought we'd lost you. :)
So, it's getting dark now. Doc is leaving early for work early, he's been mortally offended by something I said. Pardon the fuck out of me, I'm a little bit freaked out about sitting alone in a silent, powerless house in the dark for 6 hours. It isn't that I want him to stay home (oh HELL no), it's just that I'd like him to go easy on my feelings as he heads towards a building full of a/c and light.
I should go outside while there is still light and smoke a hookah. I haven't done that in a long time. It's the same temperature in as out and there is no air moving in either place. A hookah would be nice. Something fruity.
Holy Shit Balls, Archer! The power is back on and Doc isn't even down the block yet! Oh, happy day! Light! I still think I'm going to go outside and smoke a hookah.
And now I have eaten junk food. Three oatmeal raisin cookies and a slice of chocolate chip cake with thick chocolate icing and mini chocolate chips, in milk (yes, I like my cake in a bowl with milk poured over it). The night I made brownies, Doc brought home the cake, and today he brought home the cookies, trying to get me to eat. He also got me Count Chocula and Boo Berry cereal. The only time of year I can get sugary sweetened blueberry flavored ceral.
Doc used to be against the "kids" cerals for me, but everything health I like, granola, raisin bran crunch, etc., breaks my teeth, so he gave in. Our pantry is a little kids' breakfast dream.
Oh, and now an adult's dream. Jars of Nutella (5 for $1.50 ea. deal) and boxes of water crackers, and Gatorade, and salad dressings and pastas. In the fridge I have a pound and a half of feta cheese, and the same of Parmesan wedges. Super Sale. We also have two pounds of aged cheddar which is going to become broccoli cheese soup. I found a crock pot recipe. It suddenly occurred to me that I love broccoli cheese soup. So I searched Pinterest for a recipe I liked. I will also be adding some fresh shredded Parmesan.
When making a pony bead bowl from Pinterest, the one thing they don't always emphasize enough is "Take the melted bead bowl out of the glass bowl right when you take it out of the oven!" The cooler the beads get, the more they cement to your husband's favorite mixing bowl and cause house hold panic and strife. Lesson Learned. I wasn't happy with the first one I made, so I'm making a second one right now. We'll use the first as a key holder in the foyer.
I was going to experiment with record bowls today, I came up with a new design I have to actually make to see the possible uses for; but all of the LPs I pulled out of my "freecycle" crate, Doc laid claim to. And he wouldn't go look for ones in that crate that weren't his so I could work on that tonight when he wasn't around for the fumes. So I'm tearing up magazines tonight to make a magazine strip bowl. I have to decide which would be better for it, hot glue, or glue stick. It's going to be sealed with waterproof sealer. I just can't decide. Both have their down sides. Glue stick randomly comes undone, but this is in a tightly wrapped context, so that may not be a problem. Hot glue will leave a warping bead through the whole project. No matter how fast you work with it, you still get that bead, and it will eventually warp the whole project, with build up. I think I just talked myself into glue sticks. That is kind of a relief. I don't have to be plugged in. I can just sit on the living room floor. I'm making it another shape than round, so I think I may make a center piece out of polymer clay to help me hold the shape, and keep from having a gap in the center of the bottom of the bowl.
Which gave me another idea for the magazine bowls, I have ornaments of suns and full moons made of polymer clay and I was thinking about intentionally putting them at the center of round magazine bowls, and/or magazine coasters. So that's CD coasters, and magazine strip coasters.
You know, if I can do this stuff quality enough, I may just start selling it on my site. I'm over ebay. I've been paying them $10 a month to keep about 30 items listed and nothing is moving. I should just set up a small store on my new site when I set it up. Then I could call my jewelry "wearable art" like I should be, since every piece is hand designed and made, not just thrown together randomly. I'm the only person I know of who has made a lesbian pride pearl necklace. And to be fair, that did sell really quickly, but not for what it was worth. But that necklace was taking a chance, stepping out of the stereotype and making something elegant for a femme. I try to design my Pride jewelry so that the harmony of beads/colors is the first thing that is noticed and not the Pride. I want it to be a thing of beauty before it is a thing of activism. Ultimately I want it to be both, but I want the aesthetic first.
I think I have said enough for now. Even if I end up having more to say, better to break it up because I'm almost to 1500 words now, and that's a bit long.