Cydniey Buffers (cydniey) wrote,
Cydniey Buffers

Alien Landscape

Here's a fun fact: you can learn more about me with a Google search than you can with a paid background search. I was a little surprised that both my birth name and my name name are completely off the grid. Nada, nothing. No past addys or phone numbers, no possible relatives, nothing. I told Doc about it and he didn't seem surprised. I could also swear I could see him with just the faintest smile. I love his extended family. They are fun. Well, no, they are deadly serious people, with Very Important Jobs that I know nothing about. But for me, they are fun. Now, even when Evil Man (as we will from now on refer to my rapist/father of my adopted child) bothers to look at who has checked out his linkedin page and sees my name, if he does a Google, he will find my web presence, but he won't find any private information about me.

Both domains are owned by ZenWeb Media, and if they do refer back to a human, it is Doc, and there is no finding him. Not online, not off. Everything leads back to him, as a matter of fact. Since I was declared less-than-human by the US Govt. I am protected under a very cool umbrella.

So there should be no ill effects from my doing my little investigation last week. Nigel is safe, I am safe. Evil Man has his own life and his own son now and his own set of lies. All is well and good. And if Nigel ever comes looking for me, he will never find Evil Man. That's the way I wanted it. And now that I know that's how it is, a huge weight is lifted off of me. I feel so free.

I hate the picture I painted last night. I don't know if it's an aesthetic thing or if it's because it was a part of a recurring hallucination. My feelings about it are conflicted. In many ways, I hate how juvenile my art is. It's embarrassing to me. My use of bold colors against muted ones screams "no training", but I have had training. I just don't follow the rules. I create what I see. Especially if others can't see it. I guess that has value in itself. Maybe I'll make another one just for fun tonight. Get the iron out and destroy some crayons to make an alien landscape.

  • dry hot and dusty as hell

    My last surviving grand parent died a couple of weeks ago. Two days to the hour o my Nana's death, my favorite cat, Boo, died in my arms. The grief…

  • Hey there, hi there, ho there

    I'm back, bitches and bastards, TC paid for a forever pass, I should use it. The cops came over and did a welfare check about a month ago. My…

  • Got Caught Stealing

    Having had yet another clever thing stolen by a bunch of what I have to assume are white middle aged hate macines; The line in my twitter profile…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.