i haven't slept yet. i've tried. and i aim to try again as soon as i'm done with this. i'm so jealous of doc's death-like sleep. he just doesn't get to get enough, but when he can, he gets good sleep. the sleepers work on him. he hasn't tranquilized himself into early high tolerance, like i have.
and i have no tolerance for drugs that do work on me. in that, i mean, they have really nasty side effects on me. maybe i'll bite the bullet and take a seroquel to knock myself out tonight. if i just take it every so often for sleep, it won't be effective as an anti-psychotic, which is okay because i'm on another one, and it will help my sanity by letting me get a little sleep. or, rather, a lot of sleep.
if i quit coffee, i bet this problem would go away. but i cling tightly to my vices. sugar, caffeine, nicotine, and THC . . . those are the four basic food groups when caring for and feeding Cydnieys. would i substitute cola? that would be horrible. talk about getting fat again. i already drink too much of it.
maybe i'll sleep on the new couch. Chewy is doing that, now.
it's Sunday, Sunday, Sunday . . . nothing on TV, not one channel i can just put on and leave on and crap won't come on while i try to sleep. hmmm. there has to be one. we have four hundred. oh! the digital music channels! i can put one of those on. Symphony, or Swing, or Big Band or New Wave. okay, i'll do that. or just leave it on CNN, so i understand the basic passing of time if i'm awake.
what a pain in the ass i am. i am so bored with myself.