Cydniey Buffers (cydniey) wrote,
Cydniey Buffers
cydniey

wait to purr

i think i'm getting a new daughter tomorrow. doc and i talked about it, i think, and he agrees with me. he needs a cat. since jack left we have adopted cats that have bonded with me and not him. and jack was his cat. and though he's not looking to replace jack, he does want someone who will help fill the void and cuddle with him. so i came up with the idea of a kitten, he came up with the idea of a female. we looked on the adoption site and found two. he fell in love with one of them. a precocious little girl named Tulip. he's going to go look at her tomorrow. her and Shade, another darling black kitten. the adoption fees on black cats of any age have been cut in half until the end of the week. and i don't think he should pass this up. she's going to be his cat, he's going to name it and sleep with it and make it his own. i just want him to have something to cuddle. i see the hurt in him whenever major comes up to me and insists i pet him and then rebuffs doc.

having a kitten around will be chaos. it will be fun. having something little to chase the other cats and the dog around. and someone to play with all of the cat toys we have.

i finally sent kelli her birthday present from two years ago, luckily she likes it. i'm so bad at sending things. need to adjust that for the ebay sales.

Chewy is whining in his sleep. so cute. someday i'm going to capture that noise. i also want to capture Major's meow. he has such a great meow. deep and heartfelt, not high and whiny. and his howl is like a requiem. i love that cat. now if he and Chewy just got along. they have no problem being close to each other when it comes to cuddle-with-mommy-time. but Major tends to bully Chewy. he snuggles up to Chewy and then slaps him around. precious, but not for Chewy.

so doc didn't flip out on me. we discussed that my taking from his stash won't become a habit, which it won't and since i came to him and told him, he was glad we could have honesty in our relationship. the only thing he wished was that i had called him at work and told him i was doing so badly. next time i will. and i will remember to smoke his bowl before i go for the stash.

then, later, he said "no" to me about something and i started to react with my gut, i.e. badly. i stopped, assessed what was going on and redid my reaction to a more reasonable tone. BIG step for me. i felt so much better afterward. not letting the blind anger take over me and wear me out was a good thing. i didn't have to waste time calming down after. and most importantly, doc and i didn't get into a conflict over it.

today was payday and our bills are paid for the month so we got a chinese take out feast for lunch. and dinner, i packed some up for him for work, in case he's in the mood for it again. we had the choice of three entrees from a list, and he let me choose all three. bonus! now the fridge is full of take out containers and i have a stack of fortune cookies to eat.

i'm sitting here lamenting i have nothing to do, when it turns out i have lots to do on the computer. i have cam images to go through. when my archives are ready for me, i want to be ready for them. plus it's a good habit to be in, going through the images. i have to backup digital cam images and video. i made a video of Chewy on his walk the other day. if it weren't only interesting to me, i would have put it on youtube, but i don't think anyone else will appreciate his cute based on this video. i just want to remember. so much of my life is undocumented. and the more images i can get of the pets, the better.

one more night
little girl
one more night
in this cold cage
one more night
in this noisy room
then he'll come
and he'll pick you up
and he'll hug you
and you'll know
this is your daddy
no more cold cage
no more noisy room
just one more night
wait to purr
Tags: poem
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