i picked out the pictures for the next video, not sleeping this time. but i haven't picked a piece for them yet. i was too into the music and my own head and not having a headache that i just looked at pictures all night of myself. not as entertaining as it sounds. i lie. i love myself. i was noticing that i'm aging pretty well. the only thing i'm unhappy with is my mouth. ever since i lost those four teeth, my facial default setting is a frown. i hate that. i used to walk around with a smirk on my face. doc says it's because i'm unhappy with the shape of my mouth without the front teeth. true.
but other than that . . . some parenthesis around my mouth, to be expected with as much as i laugh. no crow's feet, no other wrinkles. i've been very very lucky. i don't look as young as Red. but i wear my age well, i think.
i'll miss my muffin-top if it ever leaves again. i'm kind of getting attached to my pot belly. i fit into my waist size 32" pants again. i'm pretty fucking ecstatic about that. it gives me a bunch of clothes to wear that don't have holes in them. i lean on my knees when i sit, i just can't sit back. so the knees wear out in my pants and they tear. all my camo pants are fucked. actually, thinking about it, all my olive pants are fucked. oh bother. good thing i look okay in jeans. more importantly, i'm comfortable in jeans.
i don't use tumblr, and i don't use yahoo. so how does this merger news affect me? it doesn't and the news people won't shut the hell up about it. i don't care. i made the mistake of trying to log into yahoo to check on the status of my freecycle subscription and it took me 45 minutes to get in and situated because they've changed things and become something more. everyone wants to be a facebook. goddamn, give it up. people are going to get tired of it and move on to the next phase of communication and you're going to be stuck with this merger and that platform and jesus i'm glad i got out of the web business.
i mean, i'll put my sites on my resume, no problem. but i'll never work in it again. i have no desire to catch up with the last 10 years of coding and scripting that would put me back in the game.
i don't think i'll ever work in porn again, but i won't say never. it depends. my body is past the time i'll be in front of the camera. but that doesn't put me out of the business entirely. and there's too much money to be made to shut that avenue off. but again, with respect to websites, i will never design another porn site. i'm over it.
oh, wow, Don't Stop Believing just came on my playlist. i can't believe i put this on here. heh. listening to this is like listening to a DJ that's been on acid for a very long time and is lost in their own head. i like it that way. Danzig followed by Doris Day. it makes me happy.