Cydniey Buffers (cydniey) wrote,
Cydniey Buffers
cydniey

i am a modern version of my mother. sitting here in the middle of the night listening to eighties music. lost in nostalgia.

i got sick of having the tv on at the low volume M insists on. i can't hear it and give myself headaches trying to strain to hear. the cordless headphone setup didn't work on our tv. i had a dream last night that M told me he was leaving in 33 weeks to "go back". the whole thing was confusing as dreams are. i don't want him to move out, i'm just sick of not being able to hear the tv.

so i turned off the tv and plugged in my MP3 player. i woke up on the couch with the earbuds still in my ears and no sound coming out. the batteries only last an hour on a good day, this was with a half empty battery. doc was totally oblivious. he just kept playing on my laptop. i hate him sometimes.

when i woke up, he had gone to bed. so i guess he's not staying up to watch the eclipse with me. selfish prick. he's up until 5 every damn night, except this one. last night he went to the guys' without telling me he's doing it. so he's out partying and i'm at home getting more anxious by the minute. and i called him and there was no answer, which got me more worked up. he finally came home at three thirty giddy and happy. i just ignored him.

i don't care where he went, it just would have been nice to check in with me and let me know.

dare i turn on the tv? all the good stuff is over.

i'm so mad and i feel so impotent.
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