Cydniey Buffers (cydniey) wrote,
Cydniey Buffers
cydniey

the bitching hour

this is the time of day when i get squirrelly. i took two and a half xanax and i'm waiting for them to kick in. i've already been for a walk. got the mail. can't sleep. nothing to do. i could clean something, but i'm too lazy and very soon i will be too medicated. can't come soon enough. i wish i knew what triggered me in the afternoon. it's the light, i think. we can't close the blinds so the sun reflects off the big dirt hill and pierces my brain. bright light is not my friend.

if i can just get through the next two hours, it will be dark. then things will be better. NCIS will be on at 4. around sunset.

the xanax is kicking in. i'm starting to feel better.

why can i fall asleep while doc is getting ready to go, but i can't go back to sleep after he leaves. my mind is spinning. i'm headed for the dark forest. i don't want to be in the dark forest. i want to be in my happy place, the beach at rehoboth. the first vacation i went on after leaving douchebag. kelli and i met two friends at the beach and stayed in their hotel room and spent a lot of the time at the beach and at gay clubs. fun times. hence, my happy place.
Subscribe

  • dry hot and dusty as hell

    My last surviving grand parent died a couple of weeks ago. Two days to the hour o my Nana's death, my favorite cat, Boo, died in my arms. The grief…

  • Hey there, hi there, ho there

    I'm back, bitches and bastards, TC paid for a forever pass, I should use it. The cops came over and did a welfare check about a month ago. My…

  • Got Caught Stealing

    Having had yet another clever thing stolen by a bunch of what I have to assume are white middle aged hate macines; The line in my twitter profile…

  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 0 comments