Cydniey Buffers (cydniey) wrote,
Cydniey Buffers

hot and muggy again

laying in bed awake adds to my paranoia and anxiety. i woke up at ten thirty and got right up. and i'm feeling pretty good. not having dreams helps, too. the night before last doc was teasing me about being fat in my dream and some friends were making fun of my hair loss. i woke up not feeling so good. and mad at doc for something he did in a dream. those are the hard ones because it isn't his fault what my subconscious is doing. so after a day of feeling fat i'm in my super skinny jeans. they make me feel thin. i've gotten a real complex about gaining the weight back.

felix is on my lap with the laptop. he wasn't in bed with me this morning. so now he's being clingy kitty. he only went out for a couple of hours last night. long enough to run around and get some exercise. it doesn't look like he found fred last night. he went looking in all the hiding spaces. i followed him around for a while before catching him and bringing him back in. i did see fred once on the porch. scared the crap out of him. he really hates people. there will be no taming him. just trapping him and getting him medical treatment. once we get the trap to trap him. he eats out of the cage every night. it shouldn't be much harder to trap him.

i've been having bladder control issues. i don't have to go one minute and it's leaking out the next. last night i full on peed myself. i was out on the porch smoking a cigarette when it happened and i rushed through the house with doc scolding me for making so much noise. then hounding me about something i've completely forgotten because i was half asleep. what a miserable end to a relatively good day.

today is friday, so happy friday to everyone.

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