sunny and, well, bright

i am so reluctantly up. i went to bed at midnight. i woke up/got up at nine. doc was already asleep on the couch so i sent him to bed. bummer. no hang out time. i promptly had a panic attack and set about to making the coffee table in front of me right. everything has to be "just so" in front of me. that helps me calm down. then i checked my email, part of a routine. and finally made coffee. felix is no where to be seen. i wonder if he went out last night.

i am obsessed with the Tudors. i didn't have showtime when it was on. BBCamerica plays it now and i never miss a week. plus i netflixed the seasons so i can see them unedited, they're cut for time on bbcamerica. the show is beautiful. and the pacing of it is just right, it doesn't drag along. then you have the duplicity of everyone it seems. love it!

one of the side effects of my medication is loss of appetite. and true to it, i haven't been eating. i had a couple of cheeseburgers the other day, and a banana the next, but i didn't eat yesterday and have no desire to eat today. i may change my mind, but the thought of food makes me sick. i have to get over this. i don't mean to starve myself, it just happens. time passes and i'm not hungry so i don't eat.