Cydniey Buffers (cydniey) wrote,
Cydniey Buffers


it was 107 at noon. it gets hottest between 4-6.

today is a better day than yesterday. i ended up in chat for a couple hours talking with someone about it and later called a suicide prevention line. their advice was to go to the hospital. obviously i didn't do that. the whole point of me calling was to stay out of the hospital. i just kept a grip on myself all day.

doc knew about it when he woke up, i told him. he didn't really have a reaction. didn't call me at his lunch break to check on me, didn't ask how things went when i got up. i think he is beyond caring at this point.

kelli really helped me out. i called her and she talked to me until my mood lifted. she's always good for that. she is my bestest friend and i wish she didn't live across the country from me. i wish i had just one friend here.

most of the people on chat are from other countries or the east of this one. i find it very unlikely i will be able to find someone nearby to connect with. but that doesn't matter so much. it's not a social networking site so much as a safe and supportive one. i spend all day on it, mostly lurking still, but talking with people more and more.

i have a purpose, to take care of the cats. it's not the greatest purpose or the most important one. but it's solid. i have lives to look after. i have to do the little things i do with doc. just making his coffee helps him immensely. i guess yesterday i just didn't think there was much point to it.

  • dry hot and dusty as hell

    My last surviving grand parent died a couple of weeks ago. Two days to the hour o my Nana's death, my favorite cat, Boo, died in my arms. The grief…

  • Hey there, hi there, ho there

    I'm back, bitches and bastards, TC paid for a forever pass, I should use it. The cops came over and did a welfare check about a month ago. My…

  • Got Caught Stealing

    Having had yet another clever thing stolen by a bunch of what I have to assume are white middle aged hate macines; The line in my twitter profile…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.