i am not in a good humor. all i want to do is sleep through the night and stay awake during the day. i just started eating again (slimfast shakes stay down consistently, i've been living on them), and i wanted to get my strength back up and now this sleeping thing. i don't like this and i want to cry and shake and throw a big tantrum until i wear myself down to raw hunger and exhaustion. then i want to eat and sleep. but mostly i want to sleep.
my head is blurry
and my eyes are unfocused
my limbs are weak and
do not do what i tell them
maybe i should go for a walk
that will wear me out, i would hope
but where do i go?
i am a raw and aching bundle of nerves
a walking zombie panic attack
the very thought of me walking
out the door sends me into the shakes
no, possibly a hot bath
no, doc has to shower in a couple of hours
maybe it's time i turned on tv
and lay back down on the couch