over the weekend, doc made brownies. mean mean man. though they are put away and if i don't see them i won't eat them.
i got a good look at myself in the mirror and i am now ready to comitt to losing the seroquel weight. i've also been advised of a drug that may curb my appetite, that i'm going to look into.
seeing all the old cam pics from my skinny days also brought this on.
when i started seroquel, and then when i went back on it a year later, i kind of resigned myself to the weight gain. but i realize now i'm really deeply unhappy with the way i look. it isn't just not having clothes to wear because i, up until recently, refused to buy myself "fat" clothes. i have clothes now. and i'm still dismayed by the way i look. my body, that is. on my face i just miss my jawbone and cheekbones. they are there, though. underneath.
enough of that.
the other night we had Spot out to play while T was over and he discovered what felt like a tumor on her neck. we got all bummed out and i declared no more hamsters, too heartbreaking. then i checked her a little while ago and the lump was gone, she just had something in her cheek! cheekie hamster. so now i take back my no more hamsters declaration.
and speaking of hamsters, visit my "hamsters past and present" gallery. such cute little creatures.