Cydniey Buffers (cydniey) wrote,
Cydniey Buffers

kelli said she'd be pretty jacked if a book she ordered from ebay fell apart. okay. and if i hear back from that girl, if she sends the book, i am planning on fixing it and sending it back. i can't make up for the event the book was supposed to be given for, but i can help my karma a bit.

shane came over with these wonderous pink boots that look like bowling shoes from the back. they are very cool. i can't wear them with socks, but i can't wear any of my shoes with socks. i have big feet. i can wear one pair of my docs with socks (hee), but that's it. i hate socks. they make me feel like my feet are smothering. and walking around with just socks puts holes in them and you may as well be barefoot anyway.

is this making sense? stoli is my friend again tonight. i woke up from my nap at 8 and started drinking. this isn't a long term thing. something to help me escape from the reality of life right now. the reality that i will, in a couple of months, run out of meds and will have no way to get more (i am applying for all of them through and looking into medicare part D plans so this may not happen at all). the reality that only i can do the things i want to do. no one can make me, nor should they have to. at night, when doc is home, these are some of the things i don't want to deal with. not just right now. later will do. when things are looking up, which really wouldn't take much.

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