it wasn't all that bad, just embarrassing. devastating in the moment but not so catastrophic a couple of days later.
i need to get a hold of my sister. i guess i'll search doc's phone for a number.
nothing really has been going on. i've been in my room, alone, hiding from the world. not a lot more to add there.
i made coffee. and yesterday morning i cleaned the kitchen. kelli is the one who usually does it because we have a higher tolerance of things in the sink than she does. but i wanted to do it to kind of show we aren't depending on her to be our maid. i'm the most guilty, i'm constantly leaving my cereal bowls and drink cups in the sink. i suck that way.
winter is here, i have the skin of a shedding lizard. i know, pleasant, huh? it will go away as the humidity rises.
i'm still watching the HGTV channel trolling for creative ideas. i've gotten a couple, but not anything i could do now, i need a soldering kit to do most of them. a couple require welding equipment. i'll be waiting for house living for that kind of hard core thing.
signs are pointing to me going to the dentist soon. i should have gone before the end of the year and used my yearly allotment, and then continued it in the new year. i suck and that is going to sting every time i think of it.
regrets, i have nothing right now but regrets. fine for now. i'll let it push me into action. this year will be different. i don't know when, but ultimately it will be different. it has to be. i'm losing my shit with the way things are. when i meditate, my happy place is the hospital. that is telling. and not in a good way. if only i had a way of getting that across to doc. y'know?