July 14th, 2014

2013, cyd, new

the clouds are threatening us with knives.

a smell i don't miss from the east: litter boxes in the humidity. the smell. even clean ones. it's the clay and deodorizers in the wet, it's awful.

it's so dark out. the clouds are threatening us with knives. knives of salty water and heat. a couple of rainstorms have already passed through, nothing lasting. i'm wondering if i should water the outside plants or just wait for the deluge. what plants remain. the heat is killing the tender young things. the rain will feel good to those still living.

i slept last night, undrugged. i think my brains were sucked out in my sleep, i seem to have woken up without them.

CBS This Morning is a cool show. I've really gotten into having the news presented to me and not shouted at me.

i'm done. brains gone. no more words.
2013, cyd, new

i'll stop now.

i couldn't beat the wet/heat thing so i took a really hot bath. I sweat out all that had been hanging on the edges of my pores for the past several hours, since the humidity rolled in. I read until i got bored and drank a bottle of water and a bottle of Powerade. i had a few minutes of dry/cool. stood nakey and wet in front of a fan. it was glorious.

BUT I'M NOT COMPLAINING. im glad this monsoon season is finally actually bringing us wet weather. we've only been waiting since last monsoon season. when nothing happened.

Tori Amos is on the network morning show and Kiss is doing a "residency" here in Las Vegas this summer. the world is going to hell.

And Israel is being bad. I know fuck all about the conflict, but it seems from an outside perspective that their response to three dead boys is a little, wee bit HUGE. i don't even want to watch the news.

And 52,000 KIDS at our border, what the fuck? house those fuckers, feed them, get them out of the fucking sun!

Too many kids are taking the brunt of adult stupidity and pride in this world.

and what do i do about it? nothing. moan and complain. ick. i'll stop now.
2013, cyd, new

my head!

I was doing so good. no coffee since 8pm last night. when i went to sleep at 2 with still no headache, i was feeling pretty good. i woke up with "The" headache. the "where is my fucking caffeine, you bitch?!?" headache. i heated and gulped a cup of coffee and i've been sipping my second. i've also had a shit ton of water. and aspirin. the three of them together are working nicely and this should be completely gone by the time Doc gets up. so i won't be in a miserable mood.

Bagira just pushed the empty food can off the table. good kitty. make noise. fabulous.

so i slept in my bed. i told doc of my fear of my bedroom and why and told him maybe if i tried to sleep in there while he was home for a while first, it would help me get over my anxiety. that and a xanax and i had a great nap. i think i'll stay up until 11 tonight.

Coffee just finished brewing. mmmmm. headache gone. smokes stuffed. coffee made. ready to send Doc into the world.

The storms never appeared today. the sky out is all blue. i am bitterly disappointed. but there's more coming. more chances. the problem is, we live in a valley, and when storms come in, the mountains around us tend to rip the systems apart. so they don't get to us. Las Vegas is a complicated weather place, though it doesn't seem like it would be.

When I woke up this morning, I was kind of freaking out because it was so late in the morning. so i reached for my pipe. NO more doing that. no more wake-n-bake first thing in the morning, I'm getting too old for that. It's fine after naps, but not big sleeps.

it only made it up to 100 today. So Evie and Bagira are out playing. I have to feed and water them when i'm done here.

my basil was sad this morning. in spite of two waterings yesterday, the heat got to it. i gave it lots more water and it perked up again. i hate to see sad basil. We put the leaves we harvested into an airtight bag and into the freezer, so doc can use it "fresh".

We've kept the animals (Chewy and Vader) in for a couple of days now. we're doing well. Chewy is battling constipation right now, he's not "gone circles" in a couple of days. when i take him out tonight, i hope he goes, even though i have to pick it up. I fed him some American cheese, and he got the runs. then i fed him cheddar, and he got stopped up. Doc's been feeding him bits of cooked chicken fat to loosen him up. and i've trained him to drink water on command. so i've been having him drink a lot of water.

. . . And when i started burping up coffee, i switched to Powerade. I'm listening to my body from now on. I'm taking the cues it gives me. no more of this ignoring shit. First off, i need to see a doctor about a sore on the side of my nose that won't heal. Second, I need to cut the coffee. This sleepless shit is out of hand. I've been doing this too long.
2013, cyd, new

Why is "Okay" not okay with spell check?

we de-bugged my couch today. plus for sleeping on it tonight. Doc "fixed" the mattress on the futon, pulling the back up. minus for sleeping on it tonight. The butt cushion part I would lay on is too narrow for me and Chewy to fit on at once. this could be a plus for sleeping on it tonight.

Chewy doesn't like sleeping on my bed. He left me and went into the living room today. I still woke up with him pressed into my belly and Simon pressed against my back. The whole bed, and they have to cuddle up against me. When it's hot. Foolish cats.

TV is a void, I think I'll read for a while. "Blood and Gold" is good. It introduces a few new long living vampires, and so far is the story of Marius. So it's a romanticized story set around the fall of Rome. Good stuff. Makes me want to study that for a while. I wonder if amazon.com has text books. If they have them, Kindle has them and Pirate Bay will have them. Roman history. Especially after the rise of Christianity.

Okay, off to read. Why is "Okay" not okay with spell check?