March 6th, 2014

2013, cyd, new

well, that happened

the computer slowly, throughout the day, died. i got it to boot off the system disk and completely reformatted and reloaded it to factory specifications. oy vey. i had to call kelli for strength before i could hit the start button. i really didn't want it to come to this. i lost a handful of pictures, but that's all. the rest of it is backed up.

oh, i need to go disable the touchpad. ick.

the cox site locked me out because it kept saying my password, which i had used 45 seconds before okay, was no good. so i can't download the security suite, so i can't do anything else on my computer for now. I don't even want to surf.

i think i'll go to bed.
2013, cyd, new

i'll do it on my own.

one of my pictures has been stolen and is featured with other stolen pictures here. It's not the best picture, but it's good enough. I wonder if anyone downloads these. it's quite flattering. and it reminds me to watermark my photos from here on.

i'm gearing myself up for an install fest. i slept last night. now i'm up and ready to get to work making my poor Bollux not be so naked.

One of the other things that happened with the herpes was my copy of windows decided it wasn't genuine. Bitch, please, that's the only software i have that is genuine. Do you know, you probably do, that there is no uninstalling Internet Explorer? I come to know that and then promptly forget it every time something like this happens.

This is the first non-catastrophic complete obliteration of my computer that i've had. i can actually list the files i've lost on a post it. nothing. everything was backed up. the few images that weren't are available on livejournal in their manipulated incarnations, so i still have those. it feels pretty good. and i made some mistakes with software that i didn't need, so i can go on without that mess.

speaking of watermarking, Adobe should be the first thing i install. get that suite done and settled and then i can work on the rest. i am lost without photoshop.

i have office 2010 on Bollux now, though i have a copy of office 2013, and i'm wondering if i should change it up. i only ever use word and excel. i don't need them to be fancy.

oh man, my fonts are back to default settings! cool! i kind of messed up and deleted some windows fonts at one point by mistake. now that is fixed and i still have my collection.

so much to do. i didn't let myself think about it last night because i wanted a good night's sleep. now it seems like this wall of software bricks i have to take down one by one by unwrapping each brick and making it work before i can put it aside.

oh, cool. it's sun-in-the-eyes time. i sat on the floor specifically in hopes of the sun coming out from behind the clouds for this. by the look of the clouds, i have about ten minutes of sun in my face coming to me and i want it all.

software busywork aside, i have grown tired of waiting to find people on the net to collaborate with. i'm tired of waiting for musicians to find and be inspired by my stuff and put beats to it. i'm going to do it myself. it took me three hours to set up the software the other night and that is all undone. but while i had it up and running i was really excited about what i could do. so many drum machines in Reason. and i'm going to hone my skills as a videographer and do that by myself. i will set up tripods and just record blind at performances if i have to.

it's time to take my art to the next level. i've done all i can with what i know. i want to learn more and do more. i want to be in complete control of my art. so i'm going to be. fuck the rest of the world. i'll do it on my own.
2013, cyd, new

have a good morning

auuuuughhhh! i lost all my porn bookmarks!

and my facebook got hacked. the password has been changed. i've picked a new password, and have been going around to all my sites and changing it. of course they got to facebook, first and easiest thing to do. doesn't even take time.

but i lost all my porn bookmarks! and i had just found this really great site.

i lost about half of my photoshop bookmarks, most of them were redundant, already posted in pinterest. thank the gods for pinterest. i should put my porn bookmarks on a secret board on pinterest. i think i'll do that this time. i'll also do that with my font sites, except no secret board, just a public one. i don't want to make my porn public because frankly it's no one's business what kink i'm into. i'm public enough with my life. there has to be some mystery. no one knows what it takes to turn me on except doc. and that's the way i like it. until i meet a nice girl and we go out and then we come home . . .

the stupid cox website won't let me sign in to download and register mcaffee. i even called and got my password reset, no luck. i'm going to let doc handle it.

the sounds are different now. maybe i should download some funky wavs to make the sounds. like, when i got my mail, if Kaylee said "Shiny", it would be really cool.

oh, i have to have doc show me how to set up the libraries the way we like them. i have come to rely on libraries, doc adds all my shit to them so i can find it easily. not easy to do with two hard drives and four USB sticks. Every thing is labelled, it's just that when you get into subfolders of subfolders, it gets messy.

twitter hacked too. i won't go to my bank until i have the security software installed. but i fear. i hope all the money is there. we had just enough to cover rent. if it's gone, we're fucked. but i'm not going to think like that. just some harmless malware that compromised my twitter and facespace.

all is well with facespace. changed the password back to something i know and logged everyone out of other devices. no spam or anything was posted. i didn't expect it to be. i'm not a real valuable victim. i have very few followers on my social media accounts.

I just got this lovely message on OKCupid:
"Hey there... I have a question for you. What do you think about circumcised penises? "

i'm in no mood for this shit, so this was my answer:
I think I'm not here for any penis, circumcised, wandering, uncircumcised, any penis. Not interested in a hook up. Thanks for the lovely morning image, may someone poison your brain just as liberally.

and these guys wonder why they are on a dating site? I think i'm going to keep the account just to abuse stupid people. what the fuck kind of question is that to ask someone you're interested in possibly dating? did OKCupid turn into a porn hookup site while i wasn't looking? oddly enough, that account's password was not changed.

if he writes back, i'm going to ask him his feelings on gaping, oozing hemorrhoids and see how he likes vivid imagery in the morning.

okay, i have just over 20 minutes to water the plants and clean the house. have a good morning.
2013, cyd, new

hhhhh

i'm such a hopeless case. i don't know what my problem is, but it's with doc. i could rattle off a list of meaningless things i have taken offense at, but it doesn't matter. my problem is with him, not what he's doing. or maybe it's with what he's doing and not with him. oh fuck, i've given myself a headache.

he was pissed at me so he installed the Entire security suite on to Bollux. This means every page i go to has a little green check mark graphic next to every fucking link it approves of.

and rather than just take it off and start again, i sulked. all day. went into my room in the sterile silence and just laid there. finally i went to sleep for a few hours. i got up and doc went to couch. so there was no chance to talk or anything. nice. and i'm still expected to get him up with coffee and toast at 11:30. so i can't go back to my room. no alarm clock. no clock.

i will eventually calm down and he will fall asleep (i know he's listening to me type and thinking good things to himself, that i am snapping out of "it") and i will figure out how to get rid of and then re-acquire the security suite to my specifications. and once i have that working, i will start to reload all of my software again.

today i did learn to record sound off video played on the computer. i couldn't find the clips i wanted to make my sounds for Bollux, so i decided to make them myself. that took a couple of hours to figure out and accomplish. now i have the power to make my computer say anything to me that i want it to. HA! it drives doc crazy. Every time the USB connects, Bollux says, "Ain't we just.", from Firefly. When I get email, Kaylee says "shiny".

maybe i'll record my own sounds. like "good one, dipshit" for critical stop. no, i'll keep using movie clips that i create. i got some from the Fifth Element. I want to get "inconceivable" from the Princess Bride for something. i'm a nerd. i know. i used to have Doctor Who sounds, but then every one did. now i'm back to the old standards.