i've been fantasizing about something for a while. i haven't wanted to mention it because it involves going back to school and i never wanted to go back to school before doc could. but i've finally realized if i did, i could one day get a job that would let him go back to school. i want to be a pastry chef. i miss cheffing so much. but i couldn't be a prize chef now. i haven't kept up with the food trends because i think they are all gross. i'm a picky eater. but pastry chef! i could cook and create to my heart's content and never have to see a vegetable or take apart a side of beef.
so i'm going to look into the programs in the area. years ago i defaulted on my student loan, so that is out. but as i remember it from chef school years ago, these places are meant to be affordable and rely heavily on grants to fund them. chances are we could afford it. i just have to get over the whole leaving the house thing. but i think i can do it. i really want to be a pastry chef. i would love to work at a bakery creating luscious things like quiche muffins (a life project i've been working on perfecting, not even close yet, i don't have the chemistry understanding of baking materials to invent a muffin yet, but when i do, you will all get to enjoy it!) and cakes. i'm not particularly interested in decorating cakes, i did that with my mom's huge collection of Wilton stuff as i was growing up. not my thing. but making the cakes, making cookies and candy, that, i'm in to.
so that's my big plot. turns out doc is all for it. he doesn't mind me going to school first. had i known that i would have brought it up a year and a half ago. if i can schedule myself to sleep at a normal hour and for a normal amount of time at a stretch, i could not just go to school but get myself a part time job. i will not work at walmart. i've got my eye on the corner store. they are always hiring. still minimum wage, but i can do convenience store stuff in my sleep. they are how i put myself through college and chef school the first time.
enough of this. i'm going to go look up pastry chef schools here, i should have my pick of them in this town. and then answer the coolest email i've ever gotten. once i'm distanced enough from it not to cry with happy warm feelings every time i look at it.
i signed up for info from Le Cordon Bleu on their Associates in Pastry and Baking. their "full disclosure" site told me nothing about tuition or possible financial aid. and they wanted my phone number, right. they got some one else's. not mine. i'm not talking to them until i'm ready to call them.
i've been reading forums on it, and like every culinary job that isn't on TV, it is a thankless job that requires weekends and holidays and long hours and low pay. that's for me. okay, that part sounds icky, but i've done it before and i miss it. the long hours, i mean. and i would work up to it while i went to school and eventually got a paid internship somewhere. since this is Vegas i will make more money than most others in my chosen field. it is in demand here to fuel the competitive restaurants and clubs and party companies that are always coming and going. and i could always get a "cushy" (and i use that term relative to the hellishness of a regular chef's schedule) catering job.
short intermission for chili cheese dogs . . .
i can learn to make the perfect gingerbread and make houses out of it. not realistic houses like they do on TV, but fantastical candyland houses, pushing the boundaries of gingerbread physics and covered with royal icing and candy from around the world. i've always had a thing for, but never a real use for, pretty candy. i will buy a box of Nerds simply because i like looking at them. wouldn't they make great paving gravel for a gingerbread house? i will go to the ends of the earth to peruse a candy store. especially if they sell penny candy. which i don't know any places that do anymore. they sell it by the pound.
enough fantasizing. i'll wait for the info to come in the mail and then make the dreaded phone call.
the big box of xmas stuff turned out to not be full of xmas stuff. some stuff, which i have around the house now, i couldn't wait. but get this, the rest of the box was full of Japanese crockery! doc is in heaven. he's now plotting to build a shelf to display it all on. brilliant idea! i have some great stuff on my pinterest of upcycled shelves.
i just wish he would let me paint my wooden furniture. paint is temporary and makes a hell of a difference, and i'm sick of looking at wood and doubly sick of looking at wood of so many colors. i hate it!
i've been dreaming about a place called the cottage. it has dark green tile floors and it's built deep into the side of a hill. with the front all sunshine and flora. it's a little different each time, but always the same dark green tiled floors. and small tile, herringbone style. so cool. i think i've seen it somewhere before, but i don't know where. but i'm always safe there and no cats pee there and it's always nice there and i dream about it a lot lately.