January 2nd, 2013

2013, cyd, new

My tweets

inquisitive

can't tell

i can't tell him how i feel
how can i say to him
i hate you because you don't love me?
what good will it do
to speak the sorry words
it won't change anything
and just make me look weaker
so i just look angry
and i let him ruin my day
and i fight with him
when i don't feel like fighting at all.

he says he can't have his own emotions
my trying to explain won't help that
it will just close him off further
there is nothing i can do to help this

just hold onto every resentment
tightly cling to each slight
swallow my anger and hide in the bed
safe with the cat covers over my head
2013, cyd, new

the last poem, a commentary

i'l say what i always say, not one of my best. just so you know, i do have pieces i think are my best. i compare everything to them. i was going to do a poem a day for the new year, but i knew that would just set me up for failure, so i decided to think about a poem every day and write it down if something came to me, no matter how much i didn't like the result.

a thousand of my monkey brains are working on a thousand little laptops. something good is bound to happen eventually.