December 13th, 2012

2013, cyd, new

valium + ambien = zonk

the shrink told me the tranquilizer was stronger, and i warned doc that it was also to help me sleep. so he knew it was stronger. neither of us was prepared for what i got. i got a bottle with more warning labels than bottle and doc got a lecture from the pharmacist. strong drug, high milligrams yes yes. twice as strong as the xanax i was taking, which was a lot. no driving. still. no drinking, that's nothing new. but i took one and i was OUT. then i took another with my sleeper at the appropriate time and ZONK, i was gone for a few hours.

i've had IV valium before and i remember it being a lot of fun. so this morning when i took my meds, i only took a half a valium to see if i can stay awake. today is supposed to be a rainy day, i don't want to sleep through that.

no dreams. it was a dead sleep. i didn't even wake up when i got too hot. i just took off my comforter. i woke up with it off this morning and quickly cuddled up in it. when i woke up i stayed in bed for a few minutes but i can't do that. i have to jump up bleary eyed and rush out into the door jam.

i should write an angry poem about my leather being gone. but that would be admitting that my leather is really gone. i thought about it yesterday and i can't get mad, i'm still too sad about it and thwarted in my vengeance scheme. there are cameras in the parking lot where mike works. and i don't know where he lives. i need some big friends to beat him up. but i don't have any big friends. and nothing i do will get me that leather back. revenge is meaningless, after all is said and done. unless you can do a liam neeson thing on them.
2013, cyd, new

My tweets

  • Wed, 18:16: blahdy blahdy blah…
  • Thu, 07:46: "Anybody who is Anybody will soon walk through that door. At Fat Sam's Grand Slam Speakeasy." - Bugsy Malone
  • Thu, 08:16: valium + ambien = zonk…
  • Thu, 08:38: i've had enough of Boehner. next election i'm voting for Muppets.
  • Thu, 08:40: RT @argonautband: FREE SHIPPING on t-shirts, hoodies, cups, bags, badges and iphone covers from Criminal Records, ARGONAUT, The... http: ...
  • Thu, 09:03: where's the whimsy?
  • Thu, 09:08: RT @GerryDuggan: If you guys can distract Mitch McConnell, I’ll try to slide a Ghostbuster trap under him.
  • Thu, 09:10: i don't remember anyone running on the platform of blowing up the financial infrastructure, i think someone lied.
  • Thu, 09:14: 5mg valium not doing it. still rocking. just took the other half. hopefully i can stay awake.
  • Thu, 09:15: i just got a text, jesus isn't coming back, he's too mad at the mormons. #atheism
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2013, cyd, new


this valium makes me fuzzy around the edges. kelli said i sounded blurry. i wasn't supposed to call her, but i needed her. doc said to use only his phone to call her, but his phone is never around when i need her.

it's finally raining. the clouds hold in the sound of the landing jets and it sounds like great peals of thunder. kind of neat. my rose bushes are getting water.

we ordered a gift for doc's parents today. it's supposed to be delivered by xmas. i hope they send us nummies this year. the last two years it's been steaks, ick. but before that it was wolferman's, yummy english muffins and preserves and such.

kelli said she's sending a package. that means new cat toys. the fuzzies will be so happy. freddie has almost worn out her haul from last xmas. simon has a couple of beat up toys hidden around my room somewhere. he brings them out in the middle of the night and plays on the bed with them. because of the comforter, i don't even feel it. usually. didn't last night. didn't feel anything.

now that it's raining i can go to sleep. i made doc take the truck today, so i don't have to worry about him driving home in the rain on the scooter.

time for a brief nap.