January 6th, 2012

2013, cyd, new

"greeniee, sort of blue-y . . ."

i slept from midnight until 2am. now i'm up. i'll lay back down around four and be up in time for sunrise. i remember a doctor once telling me that as long as i was getting enough sleep, when i got it didn't really matter. even if it was in incongruous chunks. dic sees this as a problem, as he does with most things i do. aside from the few moments of vague disorientation i experience upon waking. my xanax consumption is way down, dic is afraid i'm addicted to it. apparently he's been reading up on it. i'm trying to switch to klonopin, but it's addictive, too, and it isn't doing anything for me.

as far as i can tell, the new med, zyprexa, is negatively affecting my memory. i don't dare tell doc because my memory was bad to begin with. he looks poorly on medications that do that, but the truth is, they all do. but my mind is a sieve.

i'm going to start burning blessed candles, in the hopes that a republican does not win the white house. the more i know about these people and what they say they believe, the more scared of them i am. i'm not really pleased with the current president, but i didn't vote for him and he doesn't scare me. just the complete disregard for women's rights is enough on the republican side for me to hate them, but like i said, the more i hear republicans talk, the more afraid i get. i can't wait to vote.