September 24th, 2006

2013, cyd, new

new kam316 art!

i'm over stressing about little things. waiting for the day meds to kick in.

i went out and washed the windows on the car. as per the woman in the front office. the car looks much better, and yes, it looks more inhabited now. he parked it right out front. i may move it or have him move it tonight since there are so few front of the building parking spaces.

kam316 informed me it's more like 6 weeks until she is here. joy! she's put a bunch of new paintings up at my ebay store. ebay is being a bit slow in updating my store to show them. but there is the link. there's one new one up already. all money is being donated to me, thank you kam316. it will be used for the upkeep of my ebay store and, which, i daresay will be live by the beginning of the year (what, with both of us being in the same place and having computers to work on). these are very cool paintings. everything new she does, i like more than the last. the "chroma" series, especially. but the "october" pair really get me. i love them all.

i was playing with torrents and got an 80's 6 disk collection. pretty interesting. i'm listening to the metal pieces right now. and that really has to stop. whitesnake for pete's sake. whitesnake.

as i write this i calm down. timing. it is all about timing.
  • Current Music
    broken english - comin' on strong
2013, cyd, new

tmi headcase entry

i want to take a shower. i have gone in and gotten fresh towels, my scrubby glove and my aveeno wash and set them up. i have just enough conditioner for my hair.

so what is the problem? i can't hear if someone comes into the apartment when i'm in the shower. this freaks me out. to the point that i'm sitting here feeling gross with greasy hair.

for the same phantom reason i can't go outside by myself unless it is urgent (as in going up to the office the other day about the car). and then only with doc here to orient me when i get back.

after i shower alone i spend hours checking and rechecking any hiding places for i don't know who. the same phantome people who i think will get me if i go outside and get disoriented.

there is no good reason to think any of these things are real. and i can make myself believe it, so long as i'm not confronted with the activities. then all bets are off and someone is out to get me.
2013, cyd, new

all of the new paintings are up!

go here and scroll down about half the page to see them! kam316 really outdid herself with these. a special note: all of kam316's paintings will only be for sale through the end of october. so if you see something you'd like to have on your wall, do it quick. this isn't a gimmick, she's not going to hassle with them in the move. so on halloween, all sales of her paintings end until she can get new stuff done here.

thanks for checking them out. =}
me hair

there is just no reasoning with a hamster

no matter what i do, Spot will not stop obsessively chewing on the bars of her cage. i've tried negative reinforcement (with a spray bottle set to the gentle setting) which she just got used to. i've tried distraction by giving her treats or putting her in another part of her cage. nothing works. i've even tried talking to her. no go. and i don't like to just get her out and put her in her ball, because that would be positive reinforcement and would make things worse. she would chew when she wanted to go out. i've tried giving her chewy things. she loves them, but still goes for the bars. from what i can tell, she isn't doing any damage to herself. i check her teeth and gums often. and i try talking to her more. she stops for five minutes and then starts again. she also doesn't run her wheel very often and because of the lack of exercise and my spoiling her with fresh veggies and chew sticks, has become a Very Fat Hamster. i mean it. she is huge. not too big to fit through the toobs on her cage, but holding her is a two hand job when she wriggles. and pulling her out of her cage, you can forget about. there is no getting a grip on that fat furry wriggling mass. you have to wait for her to come to you. we trained her to come out a secret hole in her cage when we open access to it. i know she's smart. so why can't i stop her chewing on the bars?

it upsets me when any of my animals start showing OCD behaviors, it means i'm not doing all i can to make their lives full. this is especially hard with rodents, and so far, i've been lucky. this Spot creature is my first real challenge in this arena.

rats are so much smarter and so much easier. eventually i will find the perfect rat cage again in my life and have another rat. they are such cool animals to have around. so long as they are the tame ones. i hear it isn't at all pleasant living with feral rats. and i believe it.