i am lacking in knowledge. i want to slap another hard drive in here. i need to not mess around with stuff. two days of computer altering and messing with and i still have the bug, i still want to mess with stuff.
i'm having a real problem with my bed. tonight i'm sleeping in doc's bed. i have to put an extra matress on mine (a large futon) or something. i wake up with pain wrapping my waist every day and i really can't take it anymore. so bed alterations are the call of the day. tonight i'll sleep in doc's and then i will try to convince him to give me the futon matress on top of his matress. that may help things. if not, we have a new couch and doc's bed comes into my room.
i'm much less light headed today and i don't feel all doped up. could be the caffeine in the pain reliver pills counter-acting the depressants in my meds. or something like that.
the dollars blew away and
we played in the sun like children
i will post four million times today and not say one word of value. i can see it now. like looking into the future.
i have a book i can alter. i tore a bunch of pages out of it yesterday, now it is just begging to be altered more. and i really do want to fuck it up, i hated the book when i read it. i was warned against it too late. the only consolation, besides having the book to alter, is that i read it in only two days during a summer reading fest. so i didn't spend a lot of time on it.
what book is it? "Weaveworld" by clive barker. friends don't let friends read it. i mean really, you think i'm self indulgent and into masturbatory writing of nothing . . . well barker got it published. to me that makes it worse. oog.
but with his flowery prose in this it will be easy to find things on the page to inspire alteration. i wonder where all of my collage stuff is. i put it away. before the ECT. now i don't remember where it is. this blows. i'll find it. i have to. i am bored stupid.
altered books are damn fun! you can take text out of context and use it or you can ignore the text. you can black it out or cover it with something. i just introduced paint into the mix. that isn't so fun because you have to wait for it to dry, and i'm not so good at waiting so i'm sitting here typing this.
but really, it is such a release project. everything can be random and it is just a matter of making small collages. it is a great way to use up scraps of paper and scraps of collage stuff. i mean, i finally got to use my girl condom in a project. and it fit in with the text i highlighted. too perfect.
and the satisfaction of ripping pages out so the book shuts flush is so gratifying. i love it.
and i can quit any time and carve a hidey hole in the pages, hee.
so happy. i'm arting. that's what i do. i'm an artist. therefore i art.
for a second night in a row, the cam is on. i'm arting. still tearing up and reconstructing that book.
i was getting all depressed and realized it was because i had the news on in the background and it was really bringing me down. so i changed the channel. blues went away mostly. hee.
my new pentium 3 motherboard will not accept more than one hard drive, nor more than one CD ROM. i want to rip it out and put the old P2 back in it.
meanwhile i wait for B to test the other motherboards and see if he can't get one to work. none of them worked in my case.
i'm miserable. simple things i can't do anything about. and this little computer is going to die on me soon, the wee hard drive is full. i had to put some programs on it just to deal with my website. by the way, the cam page really does refresh on its own now.
the lightheadedness of constancy makes me want to lay down, but it is just as bad then and then you get the drunk feeling and that isn't cool. so i stay up. the cam is literally watching paint dry. when that is done drying i can move on with my project of reconstruction. i think i have 30 days on this cam software. if it isn't expensive, i may buy it, i really dig it.
cam time is over. doc will be home in an hour and i don't want him to feel uncomfortable and i'm not doing anything of interest. just reading lj. i have trillian open but no one seems to be online.
i have the book of collage doom under a bunch of stuff so the glue cures attached to things it should be.
i haven't checked my newly painted desk yet today. i need to do that, i think it needs three days at least to cure. then the surface should be just about impenetrable.
i went through so many cam applications today. right now i'm using CoffeeCup Webcam software. i like it. i have another one to try as well. the problem with my beloved chillcam is that the preview function doesn't work for long on this computer. like i said, this computer is full. i blame everything on that right now. when my 30 day trial runs out i'll take it off and try conquercam for its 30 days. after that i'll have to find a way to deal with chillcam.
i just realized that i had enough room to work at my table even with the computer and keyboard on it. cool. i've done it before, too. when i made that bracelet. and when i took pictures of the new jewelry for ebay.
i should go make things look like i did something today bedsides gluiing things together.