July 20th, 2005

2013, cyd, new

(no subject)

the key, and it took five years, is to somehow get your tone across in the text. it usually involves using more words, and reading it out loud, but if you can do it, it is really cool. i feel like i'm communicating via computer effectively for the very first time. rock.
2013, cyd, new

good morning sunshines

i feel like snark dung. i slept on the opposite side of my bed. ick. i don't even know why i'm complaining, in 30 minutes the stiffness will have faded and i probably won't even remember it. but right now it is huge in my world. the joint pain is still on holiday. and my head space is really still good. i'm happy, my back is just sore.

so how is everyone else this mor-afterneoon?

did you know that i am married to the greatest man on earth? i dont' know how it happened either, but every day when i wake up, here he is, and he insists we're married and he is as in love with me as i am with him.

i cleaned yesterday. really cleaned. deep cleaned. so the house is, you guessed it, clean. but i didn't make anything yesterday so i feel like i didn't do anything. i'll make up for that today. fabulous girl in the handmadebooks community pointed out my dremel would likely make the holes in the records without the overly complicated method i used. DUH.
2013, cyd, new


air conditioner leaks
we know this
we've been complaining for over a year
(the maintenance man just came up and told me there were a pile of workorders about it in our file that were never given to him - score one for us)
any way, it is dripping downstairs, and they are so crowded down there, they likely have the baby sleeping in the closet that leaks.

so that is why the stereo is on.
once the M guy told me they were playing their stereo to annoy me
(who tells apartment management that?!?)
and that the only solution is me turning off the a/c
i put a big ass bucket under the main drip
so they will be here tomorrow to rip out the unit, replace it, and tear out the closet and replace it
only four or five hours of no a/c
and we are not financially liable for any of it
and the people downstairs are pissed

yeah, well i don't like them either.
sorry this happened, but i just spent the last
three hours experiencing what i am pretty sure is salmonella
loud courtney love and low temps are called for this evening

i also puked up my meds. that is upsetting.

i wonder if i promised to not make any noise, if i could sit at my doctor's waiting room tomorrow. it would solve the no a/c thing and the matter of 7 hours between doc's appointment and mine and that i have no way to get there since he will be at work. i could just read and listen to my headphones.

yeah, i don't think so either.
2013, cyd, new

(no subject)

i just found out there are no planned parenhoods in arizona. maybe i read the site wrong. there seems to be a strip, that of course includes Utah, since mormon women have no need of affordable medical attention. but arizona surprised me. then again, that state has a strangeness that surpasses california's in urband legend. no martin luther king day, no daylight saving time . . . a mysterious number of old people. you don't hear a lot about arizona.

but lemme tell you. if you ever have to drive through a state, pick arizona. the scenery is great and the people are good people.
2013, cyd, new

(no subject)

i'm watching a segment on the disneyland 50th celebration on the news.

that is NOT the disneyland i grew up in.

maybe i'm not so upset anymore about not getting there for the celebration. the castle looks like they had new jersey brickface come in and cover it.

hmmmm. i like it though, when the memories are better than the new real.
2013, cyd, new

(no subject)

i think it is the coffee ripping my guts apart. i've had nothing but water for an hour or so, and then started drinking coffee cautiously. then the cramping started again. water it is.

i don't care how attatched i am to a vice, it makes me feel like this just once and i am done. i made a promise to take care of my body. and i've been doing a lousy job. smelling coffee is satisfying, if i just huff it in the morning and maybe make a cuppa tea . . . or maybe it is the milk. doc will sometimes leave it out all night accidentally. and bad milk affects me wrong even if it is barely bad. one or the other. i drank coffee last night and was fine.

i will get to the bottom of this. not eating junk food has not affected me this way before. fruit is supposed to be good, and yes i expect my body to not be used to it and to rebel a little, but this is doubling me over crying type cramps (and i've done baby birthing sans anesthesia - little bugger came out too fast to medicate me).

that reminds me of a completely unrelated thing, women (inlcuding me) don't remember the pain of childbirth. we remember it hurt, badly. but we don't remember, even in the throes of various abdominal cramps what precisely it was like. and i have a theory about this: there is nothing to compare it to. really. there are worse pains, there are more traumatic pains . . . but nothing so weird. your entire lower body is involved in the pain, and there just isn't anything else out there that so completely takes over the bottom of you. just me thinking in type.
2013, cyd, new

i have the coolest cat

i was in the kitchen, a bit jumpy since i still haven't dared takemy meds for fear of losing them again, and i dropped one of doc's wine glasses and it shattered. i was on the floor cleaning it up, crying, talking to myself about it. jack comes into the kitchen, he is annoyed i won't let him get near me because of the glass, but he sits down and watches me. i keep crying and finally get it all up and he jumps me and nurfles (face rubs) me and meows and pokes at the paper bag i've just put the glass in and folded up to throw away. and i realize, and say to him. "yeah, you break stuff too," nurfle with open mouthed purr, "and i don't get nearly this upset, do i?" and suddenly i realized there was no reason to be upset.

not a remedy i would rely on, but when the meds are out of reach, i'll reach for jack.