when i finish this cigarette i think i'll clean my bathroom . . . oh, i have to wait for the vacuum belt so i can do my rug . . . i'll do everything but that.
i wish i had some thoughts in my head that weren't related to doing things and getting things done. i quit making lists but i still have a litany of things in my head that need to be done. and on this medication i have to do stuff, i literally can't sit still for very long. i'm hoping with the final cocktail, to be completed when doc gets home, that things will even out. if not, i'm going to have to learn calming techniques because i'm not giving up the positives i have going right now.
maybe when the apartment is finished and clean, my head will have room for creative thoughts again. i can't tell you the last time i did something purely creative or sketched anything. i think that is why i keep shying away from the ebay listings, it will be a big reminder that i have a studio i am not using full of stuff that wants to be used.